It was the sound of a tiny baby heartbeat fluttering in my womb.
Yep - it is official. The Dietrich party of 7 will turn to party of 8 in March. I'm having his baby. . . again.
This announcement has caught many people off guard. We have had more gasps and slightly rude questions about this baby than all our others put together - but it has not surprised us.
Ever since Joshua entered our family the idea of another baby has been bounced around. We have joked about it, tried to ignore the thought, and finally considered that it may be God. Really, could it be God? Another baby after a 10 year "break?" Another baby when adoption has become so incredibly important to us? Another baby when our oldest is a senior in high school? That is pure crazy. . . right?
Finally it came up enough times that we decided to invite the possibility. Rather than doing everything in our power to prevent another baby, we decided to trust it to God. I was quite sure that He would not send us another baby, but I was totally open to His will.
Seven weeks later, I discovered I was pregnant. I was totally overwhelmed. He chose to send us another tiny little miracle. He chose me to carry another one of His children right under my heart. It was almost too holy to share. In fact, it took me a couple of days to even tell Chad. I just needed a moment to treasure it all quietly in my heart.
Finally one night after supper while I was washing dishes in a kitchen filled with kids, Chad whispered in my ear, "So are you pregnant or what?" And I responded, "I sure am!" Then we died laughing at the unexpected blessing of it all while the kids watched us like we were crazy. We spend enough time laughing at our own secret jokes that they did not even ask what was so funny.
About three weeks later, Sierra started being suspicious. She noticed me picking at my food one night at supper. Then another night I told her to dump out old tuna in the fridge because I did not want to smell it. Then she heard me tell Chad not to put cheese on the eggs he was planning in the morning - and she finally said, "Mom! Are you pregnant or something?" Jamison was out of town, so I did not want to reveal our news for a few more days. I also did not want to lie, so I responded - "Time will tell Sierra. Time will tell!" She played along, and I thought she was convinced I was teasing; however she later confessed to texting her book of evidence to her BFF stating that she just knew her mom was pregnant. (Her BFF thought she was nuts, of course!)
The next day, she confided in Brenna. Brenna added to the evidence, stating that I had stopped drinking wine weeks ago. . . so then they both came and asked for an explanation. Since Jamison was not going to be home until the following day, we told the kids that we refused to discuss their questions until he was home. Those two giggled themselves silly in anticipation. Then they drug their poor bleary eyed brother out of bed REALLY early the following morning for a family meeting that they arranged.
I will be honest and say I was worried about telling Krissy and Jay. One of the only things they have ever asked us not to do was to have another biological baby. The thought of their mom pregnant just grossed them out. Another infant was fine with them - but adoption was THE ONLY way to go. We value the thoughts and opinions of our kids a lot, so we were concerned about how they would feel since we broke their "rule."
When we told them, Sierra and Brenna were thrilled. Though Sierra did ask if it is safe for someone as old as me to have a baby. Ugh! Jamison looked at us and said, "Congratulations."
I don't know why, but that congrats makes weep as I type it. I am so proud and thankful that he was able to see beyond himself and sincerely be happy for us.
Krissy just shook her head. She later said, "I'm mad - but really not THAT mad." And last weekend she went to the mall and bought me a maternity shirt - my first in 10 years.
So the kids are all somewhere between OK and thrilled. They have a list of demands - like they MUST know if it is a boy or a girl, and they MUST approve of the name. We are all aware that this baby will be closer in age (more than likely) to some of its nieces and nephews than it will be to its oldest siblings. We are all aware that "normal" families do not look like this.
We are also totally aware that we are not a "normal" family. Chad and I love having our home full of kids. We LOVE and respect our teenagers. We are not trying to relive their younger years. We are not scared of being empty-nesters. We are excited to see Krissy move on to college. We do not want to hold any of our kids back in any way shape or form. We are also not done parenting yet. Being a mom is my very favorite thing in all of life, and I feel overjoyed and honored that God is allowing us to experience every age and stage one more time.
We are also totally hoping to adopt again. We are homestudy ready, and we would love to add another child to our family anytime God sees fit. Waiting, researching, and wondering His plan in this hard for me sometimes. I remind myself often that His timing and His plan is perfect. Though it is often a different plan than I ever would have guessed, it is the ONLY plan I want to follow.
Tiny baby - Always know my child that you were absolutely planned. You are a child of the one true King. He has known of you and planned for you always. Your daddy and I are honored and overjoyed to be allowed to be a part of His and your plan. You are a gift. One we will adore and treasure with every beat of your growing heart. I am so very thankful that God chose me to be your mom.
Brenna has decided she will be the pregnancy photographer. Her plan is to take a photo on the 20th of each month until he/she arrives. We shall see how long I am a willing model, but here is baby on August 20.
