Following up on Odds and Ends

In the last weeks I had many "fake friends" as my kids call them (they are people I have "met" through our adoption journey but have never had the privilege to hug) were in Ethiopia doing all kinds of wonderful, God-ordained things. You can read about their trip here.

I received confirmation today that the dresses that Krissy's sewing class made were delivered.

Pictured below is a little guy wrapped in the blanket Krissy and Sierra and Brenna made for Joshua last summer. He DID NOT like it! He told us, "send it to Ethiopia! Good boy Ethiopia have it!" So we joyfully did!

When I showed him this picture he said with a big grin, "Good boy Ethiopia warm! Yeah!"

I agree!

This team also delivered the project Gena backpacks we prepared. I am maybe, just maybe having a bit of "trip envy!" Maybe next trip I can go too!

*** On a much less important note, if you have the Wiphan cookbook, make the chicken tetrazzine. I loved it. My kids not so much, which is part of why I do not love cooking, but for the grown-ups taste buds - YUMMY!

AND - the "mystery of the pirate ship" was solved today! Joshua's BIG THANK YOU goes to cousins Addi and Ainsley!

Baptism in Ethiopia

Today Joshua and I met with the consistory of our church to present our request to have him baptized. (Chad was out of town, so he was unable to attend this meeting.)

Anyway, while I was driving to this meeting it occurred to me that I knew nothing about baptism beliefs in Ethiopia (other than that they have a very special religious holiday called Timket which celebrates the baptism of Christ.)

So I spent a little time researching what the baptism beliefs and baptism practices of the Ethiopian Orthodox Church, which is the predominate Christian church in Ethiopia.

Here is a very brief summary of what I read. (Emphasis on VERY!) While baptism in my church is a 5 to 10 minute ceremony, the ceremony in the Ethiopian Orthodox Church is lengthy and very detailed.

A baby boy is baptized 40 days after he is born. A baby girl is baptized 80 days after birth. If a baby is sick and may die baptism takes place immediately.

Babies are annointed with oil to "undo the works of devils and their magic,and so become an annointing for faith in Christ."

Babies are baptized naked because, "undressing the child reminds us of the nakedness of Adam and Eve when they obeyed satan and disobeyed the commandment of God, so they were put to shame before Him and hid from Him when they realized their nakedness. Such is what sin and satan do to human beings, they strip them from all virtues and the protection of grace, and hence put them to shame before others."

If you would like to read in more detail, I found the beliefs of adult and infant baptism in the Ethiopian Orthodox Church here. You can read the entire liturgy for the baptism of an infant here.

The one part of the ceremony that most spoke to my mother's heart was when the priest asks the mother three times, "Do you believe on behalf of this child?" And the mother is given the chance to respond all three times with, "I believe."

I have no idea whether or not Joshua's Ethiopian family wwas/is a part of the Ethiopian Orthodox Church, another denomination of Christian church, or if they were/are Christians at all. I do not know if Joshua was baptized in Ethiopia or not. I do not even know if what I have found in my on-line research is what a rural Ethiopian baptism ceremony would resemble.

While there are many unknowns, the known is what is most important.

God has a beautiful plan for Joshua Gebeyehu Chad's life. He has been with our son through each and every moment. God will never leave Joshua or forsake him.

And until my son is old enough to claim belief in the Lord Jesus Christ for himself, I am most excited to proclaim "I believe, I believe, I believe."

We will celebrate Joshua Gebeyehu's baptism on February 6. That date is (coincidentally?) the 8 month anniversary of our family being united.

**If you have any real world Ethiopian baptism information, I would love to receive it!

What's on your "To Do" List?

Many years ago at a women's Bible study I was attending the speaker asked each of us to share one thing that we make sure we do every day. It was a simple barrier breaker question, not meant to be deep or meaningful, but instead it was intended to give each of us a glimpse into the lives of the other ladies in the room.

As we went around the room many answers were shared. Things like, every day I:

• brush my teeth
• drink coffee
• work out
• pray
• read my Bible
• eat chocolate
• fix the bed

But one woman's answer changed the way I have planned each and every day since.

One meek, mild, and brilliant woman said, "I try to do one thing every day which will not be undone. You know, one thing that has an eternal impact."

WOW!

Those two sentences have truly changed my to do lists (at least on my very best days). They made me step back and realize that the majority of the items on my to do list will be quickly undone. Yes, they still need to be done. Laundry, cleaning, paying bills, running errands all have to happen. They are important, and they absolutely necessary.

My fault is that I tend to give them TOO MUCH importance. I tend to think, when I get to then end of my list THEN I will...

• send an encouraging card or email
• call a friend to pray with her
• play with my kids
• really listen to my husband tell about _____
• volunteer at church or school
• have friends over for dinner
• rock and cuddle
• watch a movie
• read my Bible and let it soak in
• have coffee with a friend

I have finally admitted that I will never complete my to do list. There is always another pair of jeans to wash, another spill to wipe up, another meal to prepare, another bill to pay. If I wait until I have all the "important" things done, I will never do any of the things that truly make a difference.

So my goal for each and every day is to recognize the accomplishment in doing things with eternal significance. Part of why I like to do the stuff on my to do list is that I feel a sense of accomplishment when I have completed the task. I feel good when my floors are clean. I smile when my bathrooms are sparkling. I feel ambitious and accomplished when I tend to the tasks of life. However, in my task-oriented thinking, the eternal stuff just does not make me feel the same way. I can not see the result immediately, so it seems futile.

Typing the word futile just caused my soul to gasp! I almost changed the word because it hurt to admit it. To admit that the way I view myself and my life tends to be through how many measurable tasks I can complete in a day is not something I feel good about. It is too often true though. I have to remind myself daily (sometimes hourly) that the tasks do not matter but THE PEOPLE DO. I have learned to consciously ask God to direct my to do list. I ask Him to show me the meaning in the eternal. I ask Him to slow down my thoughts and steps so that I do not run ahead of Him when where I really want to spend my time is following His path.

So, do you want to change your to do list for the weekend?

I hope you (and I) have a wonderful weekend, filled with many moments with eternal significance.

Mystery Mail!

Joshua Gebeyehu received some very exciting and mysterious mail this morning...

it came in a BIG box, what could it be?

He waited excitedly while mommy put it all together and

DISCOVERED it was

a BIG SHIP!

with a STEERING WHEEL!!!

It even has a door to crawl out

and to crawl in!

We named his fine ship "The Joshua Gebeyehu!"

Now the only mystery that remains is who sent this wonderful surprise?

We owe someone a big Thank you!!!

A Policie-man in my Kitchen

It was a very exciting morning. Joshua had a playdate with his buddies Drew, Ageze, and Tesfa. AND if that is not exciting enough... Drew's daddy, Officer Luke stopped by to say hello.

Joshua WAS THRILLED! He really likes Luke, and the fact that Luke has a policie-car makes him WAY more exciting that all the rest of the daddies.

It was WAY cold out - like 25 below zero - so we talked Officer Luke into pulling his policie-car into the garage so the boys could take a look. My car crazed Joshua was in the drivers seat immediately. Luke showed him how to turn on the lights. Oh, I wish you could hear Joshua tell about it. He was SO excited!

Look at that grin! (if you can see past the glare - those policie-cars have really bright lights!)

Hopefully this is the only picture I will ever see of my son in the back seat of a policie-car!

Luke came in and showed the boys all the cool stuff on his belt.

Joshua was totally intrigued with Luke's baton.

Luke let Joshua have a turn. Joshua told me, "Luke share Joshua! Good job sharing Luke." when he saw this picture.

This is Joshua trying and trying to flip his wrist hard enough to make the baton extend. He is not quite big enough, but he sure tried hard!

If you are in Joshua's world it does not get much better than having a Daddy that lets you ride in a backhoe and a godfather with a policie-car! Good times!

Once A Week Cooking

With 7 members of our household, I am always looking for ways to SIMPLIFY my schedule in order to allow more time to listen to, relax with, and enjoy my family.

One task that I do not enjoy is cooking dinner each evening. Maybe it has something to do with one family member or another complaining about my meal choice? Maybe it has to do with how busy the hours after school become with various activities to drive to, hearing about everyone's day, and homework? Maybe I am just out of caffeine by 5:00? But regardless of the reason, I do not look forward to cooking dinner!

So for the last month I have spent Monday morning preparing meals for the rest of the week. I make a menu and grocery list Sunday evening, then after we drop the older kids off at school Monday morning Joshua and I head to the grocery store. It is SO quiet in the grocery store Monday mornings - I love that!

When we arrive home, we unpack and start cooking. Sometimes Joshua helps, but he is generally so happy to play in our quiet house that he entertaind himself really well. (He adores his siblings, but he also LOVES to have the house to himself with no noisy interruptions!) By 11:30 we have 4 meals in the fridge waiting to be put enjoyed later in the week.

So what do my menus look like? I have actually gotten fairly creative. As I plan the menu for the week I take into account the evenings that we have activities or will be eating at different times - like when Jamison has basketball practice from 5:00 until 6:30, or Chad has a late meeting. On nights like that I fill the crockpot with soup, stew, taco meat, or sloppy joes. Some family dinner favorites are meatloaf, pot roast, pasta dishes - like lasagne, spaghetti, chicken tetrazzini, rigitoni. I also have a few one pot meals (AKA hotdishes) that my family likes. So I have come up with a good variety of things that can be mixed up Monday morning and cooked hot and fresh later in the week.

This week we are having:

• Crescent Taco Bake - easy and yummy! Crescent roll crust filled with taco meat, Spanish rice, black beans, and cheese, topped with Doritos.
• Chicken Tetrazzini - p.124 Wiphan cookbook
• Marinated steak and veggies w/ rice - marinade p.135 Wiphan cookbook
• Beef slow cookers sandwiches - p. 134 Wiphan cookbook

(Sounds like an add for the Wiphan cookbook, huh? I tend to pick one cookbook for the week. Just one more way to keep it simple!)

Friday night we have usually have pizza. On the weekends we have big breakfasts prepared by Daddy! Chad and I tag team the lunch and dinner cooking in a very disorganized fashion. Usually Chad cooks and I cleanup.

In the last 6 weeks, my once a week cooking experiment has helped to make afternoons much more relaxing. I have even been able to get on the treadmill a time or two!

I know many of you who read this work out of the house full time. Bless You! Truly! I only put in about 15 to 20 hours a week of "paid" work and I am tired! I know you could not cook Monday mornings, but maybe Sunday afternoons?

I am ALWAYS looking for ways to SIMPLIFY, so if you have any great ideas to share I would love to hear them!

Joshua speaks about waiting for his mommy...

As Joshua has been home longer and longer the way he processes grief and questions has changed. At first his grief was expressed in a certain "tone" when he cried - just like you can tell when your newborn is hungry or scared by the tone of their cry, I could hear Joshua's tone of grief. Holding him while he cried and cried was the only way to express my sympathy and love.

However, as his trust in me and his language skills have developed over the past months he is able to verbally share his grief, fear, and confusion. He is also able to accept my sympathy, love, and reassurances.

This weekend, Joshua found the picture below.

He has seen many pictures of our family before he joined us. He always asks, "Where is Joshua?" And I respond with either "you were not born yet" or "you were in Ethiopia." He has accepted either answer fairly nonchalantly.

But THIS picture he brought to me with tears in his voice. He said, "Mommy NO in this picture! Mommy get you Joshua! Joshua need you mommy!"

Those words expressed toward this picture nearly stopped my heart. This picture was taken while we were on our "American dream vacation to Florida" and while Joshua was being transferred from a foster home in Awassa, ET to the orphanage that would refer him to us. It was taken at a time when I know he was scared, confused, lonely, weak. He did need me.

While I did not tell him all those details, I did tell him that I was trying. I was trying as urgently as I could to get to him. I was praying for him. I was sad and lonely waiting, too!

I scooped him up and he cuddled under my chin sucking his thumb and considering the truth of my words. We sat there a long while holding each other. Then he got up and went to play.

That conversation has been repeated many times this weekend. He needed to tell me about how sad he was AND he needed to hear me tell him that I understand. By the end of the weekend the conversation was quick and easy, we both knew the "script" and that "script" has helped us both to walk one step closer to healing.

Someone asked me recently if I really thought small children "cared" that they are in an orphanage. Do they really know the difference?

YES. No matter how young, no matter how amazing the orphanage, they KNOW. We were made to be in relationships - close, nurturing relationships. Children were meant to have parents - mommy and daddy - not nannies. They know. They long. They hurt. Many wait.

In case the above story does not have ou convinced, here is another.

I was watching a video of a waiting baby with a friend. The baby was crying. Joshua came running to see what the noise was. He saw the baby crying. His FIRST question was, "Is that the baby's mommy?"

I told him, "No. That is a nanny."

He told me, "Baby is crying for mommy. No I like it nannies! Joshua cry mommy! mommy! Baby needs mommy! Mommy come, baby stop. Baby happy!"

Later I asked my son, "Were you happy when this mommy came? Or scared?" (I was wondering if he really knew I was coming. Or was it his Ethiopian mommy the mommy he cried for.)

He responded, "Joshua waiting thissie mommy. Joshua no scared. Joshua happy. Joshua no like nannies! Joshua I love it mommy!"

They know.

Has it been hard? Has he grieved? Has he ever been scared? YES.

Has he ever wished to go back? NO.

They know. They long. Many wait.