Once in a while Chad and I have a conversation that melts my heart forever.
We have had several conversations that have changed my perspective completely over the years. Usually what sticks in my mind and heart forever is one simple phrase. This happened again very recently.
Chad joyfully parents with me. He is thankful for each of our children. Yet, in all reality he may have been "done" at two or three if I had been. I am a BIG family momma. Chad has always known that. One of the things I have recorded in our engagement journal is that we would have as many children as we could afford. That was our agreement. No number, just the goal of being able to provide for them. Well. . . that and he said they ALL needed to be boys. LOL!
When we discovered I was expecting #6 he did ask me (only partially joking), "Alicia, how many more do you think there will be? I mean give me a number. . . 10. . . 12? I may need to prepare mentally!"
We laughed and laughed.
And then he said it.
He looked into my eyes and said this phrase that is forever seared into my heart, because it is so wise and so true.
"Just know, babe, that we will never regret having another child. Never."
(Sigh.)
I am so thankful for a man who shares my heart and passion and life so beautifully.
His daddy may melt my heart, but this little boy makes me laugh.
This week I noticed that Joshua always refers to the baby as a boy. I told him, "The baby might be a girl, you know." He quickly responded, "Yeah BUT it might be a BOY and I really hope it is! We have a lotta girls already!" (Surprisingly Brenna agrees! She hopes the baby is a boy, too.)
A day or so later he wanted to know if after this baby was born I could please have two or three more babies. I explained that this would probably be my last baby since I was getting close to 40. (I will be 39 when baby arrives.) He did not respond.
Fast forward another day and he snuggled up to me and said, "Mom, I know you are kinda old. But do you think we could still find a brother who looks like me someday?"
I said, "What do you mean? Do you mean a brother with brown skin?"
He said, "Yeah! Please?!?"
I assured him that there is not a day that goes by that mom does not pray that God would send us a brown skinned brother or brothers or maybe even a sister (gasp) if it is His will! I reminded him that his daddy and I have been trying to adopt again for a long time, but so far God has not allowed it to happen.
He responded with complete relief! "Oh GOOD!" he said. "You can 'dopt when you are old! I'm happy now!"
(For the record, my doctor was not NEARLY as concerned about my age as my children and my father seem to be. She laughed when I worried telling me she sees many women my age every day!)
Even in my "old age," I continue to feel great. Food is tasting good again! I don't have any huge cravings, but I do like fruit flavored candy way more than usual. I am not usually a candy girl with the exception of dark chocolate on a rare occasion, so when I pulled skittles from my purse last week, Chad was shocked!
I am completely exhausted by 3:45 when Joshua and I get home each day. I am so thankful that most days I can take a nap.
The kids have a list of approved baby names posted on the refrigerator. The "agreement" is that they will come up with a list of names that would be "acceptable." Then when baby is born we can tell them which one we have picked. They crack me up!
I have officially outgrown almost everything I own; last weekend I finally ordered some maternity clothes. For the record (Dardi) maternity clothes are much cuter when you are not the one wearing them!
While I may not love the prego belly look - I very much prefer looking pregnant to looking chubby! And with the belly comes baby kicks, which I adore! I actually started feeling the tiniest of flutters last week! It is really early to feel movement and it is not frequent and very subtle - but I am sure it is the baby. I am also so very thankful! I think it is God's answer to my prayers for peace and reassurance.
